Coaching The Coach...
Last week I received 3 free consultation requests from potential clients in Egypt. As a procedure, I sent them my intake form to answer few question to have an idea about what’s going on in their life so I can focus on how I can help versus wasting the session asking questions.
The first potential client replied that the form is too detailed and she does not have answers for every question. I replied submit what you have answers for, I did not hear back from her.
The other two never replied or sent the forms back, and here the game got a lot more fun. The coach became the client:)
I noticed that I was a bit irritated, and here are some of the stories that played in my head and caused the irritation:
1. No wonder Egypt is in trouble, no one wants to do what he or she needs to do ( Funny yeah? it became Egypt's problem)
2. They want others to solve their problems without even spending the time to help themselves answering few questions
3. How disrespectful, no answer, no cancellation for the appointment
The list goes on….
Whenever I notice the negative emotion this is when I need to pause and ask the 4 famous questions of the brilliant Byrone Katie. I chose the last story to work with
Is this true?
My answer came fast, YESSSSS
Are you absolutely sure this is true?
How do I feel when I believe the thought that they are not serious and disrespectful of my time? How do I treat them and myself?
I feel angry, I ignore them, and I judge myself in the process.
(Good luck Nevin, how would judging yourself and ignoring a potential client help you)
Who would I be without the thought?
I would be more curious, versus pass the judgment. I would reach out ask what is going on. I would be more engaging. I would be more ME:)
I called the first one, and asked: did your receive the emails and if are we on for the session today? She replied yes, sorry I did not check my email the last couple of days!!!
Our call is due in a couple of hours.
Situations have no power, it's the assumptions, the story we attach to the situation and then we believe. Assumptions are dangerous in relationships and communication!!! This is what I teach my clients and myself.
Situations will always happen and we have no power over them. Stories will always rise, but every time we have the choice to pause question and choose our response, or believe the story, feel bad and react!! Change your thoughts, own your emotions and be at cause of your life not effect!
The Sunrise of a new life!